


I'm So Sick

by FatalTie



Series: Watch Me Fall Apart [2]
Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Angst, Drama, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-29
Updated: 2014-06-29
Packaged: 2018-02-06 16:32:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,196
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1864725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FatalTie/pseuds/FatalTie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loveless Au.<br/>"I’m not like those kids you beat up in the back of alley-ways,” His knife pressed closer, “You can’t get everything with violence.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm So Sick

**Author's Note:**

> Takes place before the first "Watch Me Fall Apart" but is chronologically 2nd in the series.

“Ahhh, Masaomi-kun!”

His name rolled off that vicious tongue in a way that made his whole body shiver, down to his tail.

“Come in, come in! How nice of you to visit.”

Izaya stepped back from the door and slithered his way back into the apartment; his tail disappeared around the corner with him. Kida slinked in after him, kicking the door closed behind him. He toed off his shoes, the cold tile seeping pass his socks. He peeked around the corner; Izaya was sitting at his desk back to him, his sleek tail lazily spilled over the arm of the chair onto the floor. His skin crawled.

He hated being here.

“I don’t have all day, Masaomi-kun~”

Kida grunted and shuffled his way fully into the room. Izaya swiveled his chair around to face him, mouth twitching into a grin.

“And what can I do for you today, my cute Masaomi-kun?”

Kida tried his best to appear casual but he could feel his body had betrayed him. There was a light sheen of sweat collecting on his neck and his ears were practically flush against his head. Behind him, Kida felt his tail twitching irritably.

“Maybe I just wanted to visit you, hm?” He stuffed his hands deeper into his pockets and grinned. He tried to loosen his stance and relax. Izaya preyed on fear.

He knew when Izaya’s smirk only deepened that the man was already on the hunt.

“Ohhh?” The man stood up from his chair and made his way to Kida, “As much as I would love to believe that you’d come all the way here just to see me—” he stopped just a little too close, “I think we both know that’s not why you’re here.”

He reached out to grab Kida’s chin; he flinched, stepping back. His grin strained as Izaya laughed.

“You’ve never been very good at this game.”

Kida pulled his hands out from his pockets to shrug and sighed.

“Ahhhh~ You got me there! Who would come visit a creeper like you just because?” He shook his head solemnly. Kida could feel his ears starting to perk up slightly. He just had to keep playing it cool. Fake it until it’s real they say.

Izaya chuckled, “You wound me. Keep telling jokes like that and I won’t want to do any favors for you, Masaomi-kun.”

He turned away to start heading towards his desk again, “After all, you _did_ come all the way here to ask me to leave your poor, little Mikado-kun alone, right?” He sat down on his chair, drinking in the stricken look on Kida’s face. He laughed again.

“Oh, Masaomi-kun,” He cupped his chin in his hand, elbow resting on the arm of the chair, “Even if I were generous enough to lend out favors at the drop of a hat, Mikado-kun is too important of a piece now.”

He smirked again, tail swaying behind him, “Leaving him alone isn’t an option.”

By the time Kida had his fist wrapped up in the collar of Izaya’s shirt, other fist pulled back, Izaya’s knife was already pressed precariously against his throat.

“Now, now! Don’t forget, I’m not like those kids you beat up in the back of alley-ways,” His knife pressed closer, “You can’t get everything with violence.”

Kida could feel his fists shaking with barely controlled rage. But after a moment he lowered them, his hand releasing the hold on Izaya’s shirt.

Izaya hadn’t removed his knife. His eyes narrowed, pleased looking.

“See, Masaomi-kun? I knew you weren’t as stupid as you looked.”

He carefully moved his knife away from the boy’s neck, smiling still. Kida grit his teeth, tail swiping back and forth behind him angrily.

“What do you want?”

Izaya closed his eyes, sighing. He waved his hand dismissively.

“I take it back, maybe you are stupid,” his eyes opened just enough to peek at Kida, “You have nothing to offer me anymore.”

Kida could feel the dread from before seeping back into him. His throat started to feel dry.

“Nothing?”

Izaya’s eyes had suddenly seemed fixated above Kida’s eye level. The grin that appeared on the man’s face was dripping with malice.

“Well…” Izaya carefully stood up from his chair again, “There might be one thing that’s worth leaving little Mikado-kun alone.”

Sweat started to accumulate on the back of Kida’s neck again, “What is it?”

Izaya smiled cheerily at him.

“Let me have your ears and tail and I promise I’ll leave your friend alone.”

Kida balked and took a step back, unconsciously reaching up to cover his ears.

“W-What?! You want to cut off my ears?”

Izaya shot him a deeply unamused look.

“Eh? Are you really that stupid, Masaomi-kun? There’s a much less painful way you know; don’t they teach you kids sex-ed anymore?”

A sick feeling welled-up in Kida’s stomach. He chuckled uneasily.

“Sex with a minor, Izaya? Isn’t that a little grosser than usual for you?”

Izaya shrugged, “If you don’t want to I don’t care, its fine for me either way—”

“Why do you want them?”

Kida’s heart was already racing, but even so his body felt cold. Izaya looked bored.

“To certain people they’re pretty valuable. Now, I _do_ have other work to attend to so if you’re not interested—”

“W-Wait!” Kida had that stricken look on his face again, “Just give me a second to think about it.”

Izaya crossed his arms, finger tapping his arm.

“You really need to work on your manners, Masaomi-kun. It hardly seems like a big deal, plenty of guys your age have already thrown their ears away by now.” His own tail swayed back and forth behind him, like a beacon of contradiction. Kida’s eyes narrowed.

“You still have yours.”

Was Izaya just fucking with him?

Izaya patience had run out and he sighed again, his sleek black ears twitching in irritation. He turned away from Kida.

“You can show yourself out, Masaomi-kun.”

“I’ll do it.”

Izaya peeked back over his should to look at Kida through crinkled eyes.

“Really, now? My, what a self-sacrificing friend you are, Masaomi-kun.”

Kida didn’t meet his eyes.

Izaya made his way over to the pristine couch in the center of the space, plopping down on the cushions. He gestured to Kida lazily.

“Let’s try to make this quick, okay? Take off your pants and come over here.”

Kida stood still for maybe half a minute, his legs quivering beneath him, before Izaya let out a frustrated noise that jolted him into action. He struggled for a moment undoing his pants and then pushed them down his shaky legs. Boxer-briefs followed and both were kicked off to the side. He shuffled over to couch, sitting next to Izaya who looked increasingly bored with each passing second. Kida still wouldn’t meet his eyes.

Izaya reach out to lightly grasp Kida’s dick, disinterestedly fondling him. Kida felt himself flush at the touch regardless and felt himself start to get hard.

“You know what’s interesting about virginity, Masaomi-kun?”

Kida shuddered as Izaya continued to work him in his hand. He reached up to lightly tug on one of Kida’s ears.

“It’s almost entirely a social construct. There’s no exact definition for when someone is no longer a virgin.”

Izaya squeezed Kida a little harder and he bit his lip to stop any sound from escaping.

“So basically, when the body rejects its extra ears and tail that means that person has unconsciously determined that they are no longer a virgin.”

It took only a couple of minutes before Kida came in Izaya’s hand, his eyes screwed tightly shut. He was silent. Izaya let go of him, disappointed.

Kida could still feel the blood pounding in his ears.

Izaya frowned at his dirty hand.

“Hmm… What determines when someone’s lost their ‘virginity’ can be different for each person. For some people, that alone could have been enough to trigger it.”

He sighed and shoved his dirtied fingers into Kida’s mouth, his other hand grabbing onto Kida’s hair to roughly tug his head back. Kida choked in surprise.

“It seems we’ll have to take it a step farther. It’s in your best interest to lather these up Masaomi-kun,” he tugged on his hair harder, “Unless of course you rather me go in dry?”

Kida gagged, the taste of his own cum overpowering. Tears welled-up in his eyes.

“Move it along, please. This is just as disgusting for me as it is for you.”

He gagged for a little longer before he tried to gather up the spit needed. He tried his best to use his tongue, but Izaya’s fingers were shoved too far back. After a moment though Izaya removed his fingers and Kida felt himself get tugged onto Izaya’s lap. He coughed and drool dripped down his chin.

Izaya grasped his tail and tugged it up and out of the way. Kida stiffened.

“W-wait a second—”

Izaya was not gentle when he shoved his fingers into Kida, his fingers worked to try and loosen him. Kida felt his mouth drop open in a silent scream. It _hurt_ —

He could feel a tightening of something in his chest as Izaya’s fingers invaded him, coiling and coiling and—

It snapped.

It was a strange feeling, he suddenly felt very detached from the situation. All feeling in his tail and ears stopped, and he felt something slide down off his head.

He stared down at his soft, brown ears on the ground.

“Oh. That was sooner than I thought!”

He vaguely aware that Izaya’s fingers slipped out of him as the man leaned forward to rest his chin on Kida’s shoulder. He snickered lowly.

“Looks like your body knows you’ve been defiled, Masaomi-kun,” He leaned back examining the now lifeless tail in his hand, “Turns out you were much more pure-hearted than I thought.”

Izaya wiped his hand on the back of Kida’s shirt, before pushing him off his lap. Kida slipped off of Izaya and on to the cushion next to him, watching as the man leaned forward to collect his ears off the floor. He made a content noise, standing to head over to his desk.

“I suggest you get off those cushions before you get blood on them.”

Kida didn’t acknowledge him, still staring down at the floor.

Izaya dropped the appendages onto the desk and turned to face the expansive bookshelf. He rummaged through the books, stopping to pull out a medium sized jar filled with a clear liquid. He returned to desk.

Kida remained stiff, still looking down at the floor.

“As I said, I’ll make sure to do my best to keep Mikado out of my dealings,” He uncapped the jar and carefully started putting the ears and tail into it, “Of course though, I can’t stop Mikado from digging around himself.”

The boy finally looked up at Izaya, his face pale. Izaya smiled.

“So that’ll be up to you, Masaomi-kun.”

Kida only stared at him.

“… seriously get off my couch. You’re free to go now, these are all I needed.”

Kida stood up on his jellied legs and made a bee-line for his underwear, wincing the whole way. Izaya screwed back on the cap, watching Kida carefully. The boy struggled for a few minutes pulling on his clothes, and then shuffled over to his discarded shoes.

Izaya smirked, moving back to the bookshelf to put the jar back.

“Feel free to come visit me again, Masaomi-kun!”

The door slammed shut.

Izaya giggled to himself, rearranging the books to hide the jar.

“What an idiot.”

Outside, Kida made a point to empty his stomach right next to the door. He swiped his hand over his mouth and straightened his back. It was already dark outside.

The walk home felt like nothing, one moment he was outside of Izaya’s and the next he was in his apartment, crawling into the shower. He thought of nothing but the water running down his back. He kept raking his hand through his hair, waiting for his fingers to get caught on something that isn’t there anymore, and he sobbed.

It started to feel like he was suffocating in the small shower stall, so he shut it off and shuffled, dripping wet, back into his room. He collapsed on the bed, face buried in his pillow.

He spent hours on his bed, well into the night, before he moved. He blindly reached for his phone, and pulled it closer to him, tapping to check his messages. There was a lone message from Mikado, received hours ago. He wanted to hang out tomorrow. Kida’s grip on his phone tightened, and he choked out a sob. How would he face his friend?

It was another hour before Kida found the strength to pull himself off the bed and slip into loose clothes. He started walk to Mikado’s because he knew he’d have to face him soon enough.

And right now being alone was too painful.

When Mikado opened the door, the look of shock on his friend’s was enough to make a laugh bubble out of his throat.

_“Masaomi… your ears…?”_

_“Looks like I’m all grown up, Mikado!”_


End file.
